Too happy to weep

I don't feel the loneliness creeping up on me...
I can't write about this--
Not anymore

I can only mimic the echo of my dismal voice,
but alas,
Nothing compares to this being with you
this unloneliness
.
.
.
Yet
I am not whole;
I am incomplete
A tethered soul
.
.
.
And till the day I die
This manner I will be,
but alas
I am too happy to weep






 

Bird

I’m free
I’m a bird
in the sky,
heaven’s worth,
all thy disguise;

I’ll try to hide
in the clouds,
but my wings urge
me to soar,
soar up high
then down below;

Where the grass is green,
where the roses grow
I feel so free
I’m a bird
so come on lover,
come be with me;

Be as free as me
in a world so pure
as the images in my mind implore
to control the sweet words;
I want to adore,
adore you till the day you die;

In the green grass
Below...Where the roses grow.

Canvas

I look in the middle
and I see your face;
specks of black,
splattered on a white canvas.

I don’t look away
I cry tears—begging it—
to stop the demons in you,
to go away,
but I’d never leave you;
I’ll be the purest being you own.

I look in the middle
and I see me too;
specks of black,
drawn with a shaky hand,
mixed in with the reddest red,
splattered on this virgin canvas.

I see you.
I bleed your blood.
But I’ll be the purest being you’ll ever own.

Need It

You don’t need it;
You need my eyes
hot on you
my lips
aching to taste your soul.

You don’t need it,
you need my sanity
mix it with your madness;
We’ll be so beautiful
this creation
It’ll be the birth of you
The rise of me.

Come on!
Need it
Need me like the powder you sniff
Need it
Need me like I’m yours to make sane
Need it
Need me
Need it no more
Come on!

All you need is me
my eyes hot on you
So leave it...

But you don't
but you can't
So leave me instead...

Whisper My Name

Whisper my name...
(in that way)
when the lights are dimmed
it’ll carry me away
to this place
of an absolute quiet,
a solitude so beautiful.
I’ll pray;
then you’ll stay.

Tether me to your soul
beware of its heavy hold.
I wander all alone
and wish for nothing worse,
but whisper my name
(in that way)
bring me home.
If I pray to your God,
then you’ll stay? 

'Cause I don't want to be alone anymore.         

Lost Love Poems

 

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That Could Have Been My Brother

That could have been my brother,
bleeding on foreign dirt
taking his last breath
long away from his journey back home.

They even look alike,
Only Mitch had over twenty years on him,
Family on Dutch soil,
Children who'll never go to the beach
with their father anymore.

That could have been my brother,
I always worried when he barked out a storm,
His loudness just the creation of our culture,
walking through those same streets,
with that stubborn head held up high.

That could have been my brother,
And I too would have demanded justice at their front doors--
But with buckets full of never-ending tears
with the cries of a mourning mother.

It's the only sentence on a loop on the track-list of my mind;
"It could have been my brother..."
It could have been.
But-
It can still be me.
It can still be you.

The Old Volcanco

Your hands are not idle,
dipped in magma,
the underground of your rage,
strained from exertion.

Your voice boisterous,
in colorful ways,
but don't you see my gaze,
the cold shiver down my spine?

The mere image takes fear
and sprinkles it in my brain,
creating flashes ancient to me,
of the old volcano.

The one who calls me a daughter,
with its hands made of leather,
the slashes cut deep,
and the cries drown my mouth,
until I don't know my own name.

Begging to stop,
to stop the images that cloud my reality,
to stop the force inside you,
to stop the volcano,
to stop the old,
from consuming you,
from consuming me.

Wrong With Me

What is wrong with me
that I need to love unconditionally
can't I just be fine
with what you're giving me?

What is wrong with me
that I give third chances
can't I just give up
on what you mean to me?

What is wrong with me
that I need to stay
to see you try
holding my breath,
I'll die,
under your still hands.

What is wrong with me
that I need to trust unequivocally
can't I just be fine
with the little you give me?

No...
          And,
that,
           is,
what's,
                     wrong,
                                             with me...

Guitar Chords

You made me,
into a mold
of black and white
of guitar chords.

You craved me,
like sugar in wine
the laughter and smile
bread dipped in gold.

Black trees fill my mind,
your eyes the center,
the hazel that burns,
from the way you made me…
of black and white,
of guitar chords.